The Dark Egg.

I have followed the dark track as it twisted and meandered through trees and hedges. I saw many fields prepared in the same manner as the first I encountered. Rounding a bend I came across one of the metal carriages you warned me to expect. It stood in a field untended and untied. I hid my Ned away from view and went on foot to better describe the beast for you.

It is most definitely made of metal and is not a living creature but a made one. Some of the iron is dull and some is decorated. It is bright green in colour and has two wheels as tall as a man. These are black like the track, they are hard yet soft, I can depress them with thumb. They are marked and inscribed with numbers and letters. There appears to be a seat high up enclosed in a windowed room. It is very small and a man in full armour could not sit there in comfort. So this is not meant for battle. The field here is part ploughed and I can see now that this carriage is used to make the furrows. To its rear, away from the seat, there are three foot high blades of polished steel set amongst many metal rods. I would like to meet the smithy that made this for he must be above master of his craft. A small shield is fixed to the front; it has the name “FORD” on it. Could this be the owner? Below this is a metal shield punched with holes. Looking through I can see the inside is made of metal and gearing. Like the workings of a portcullis. Here as well there are two much smaller wheels but these seem very hard to the touch.

I have returned to Ned having heard a roaring in the distance. It was getting louder and I calmed my horse as the beast rumbled past us on the track. We hid in the hedge but I saw that it was smaller than the carriage in the field and was moving faster than a horse at full gallop. There were people inside it though and they were musicians as I could here a strange music as they sped past. A wondrous thing to behold and I felt no fear but there was a lifting of the heart. I am traveling alongside the track not on it. This is not difficult and I have found some interesting objects along the way. I have kept some of the smaller for you to see for yourself. Some metal cups that have been crushed. They are as light as feathers and brightly decorated. They have a hole in one end it is so small and I cannot even fit my finger into it. In some there is still liquid. I dare not taste it though.

I have just found something most strange, it is parchment similar to that I see in your quarters but this is much lighter. The subject matter has to be seen. Naked wenches posed in all manner of rooms, wenches the like of which I have never seen. The people of this land must be the most beautified imagined. Their skin is perfect, their bodies sublime and hairless. They have no sores or disfigurements. There are also many words for you to study and images of this land that I cannot even guess at. I am better prepared now. To see such beauty first hand would have stood me agape. They would have taken me for a fool and simpleton.

I must write this before I forget. I had stopped to feed and water. The track was a little way across a grassy area and there were some tables set up under a tree. I was sitting and Ned was tied and feeding. I heard a sound and three people, one female and two young men came from the track waving at me and talking. I almost leapt for my sword then noticed they were not threatening. The female spoke to me then approached Ned. He did not seem concerned so I to relaxed. I could make out some words but when questioned I simply acted mute and grunted. One of the males called me “Mate” and offered me some bread and a container of water. Was I to be his mate? I was tense and ready to defend myself. They were a little taller than me but I could have snapped them like twigs if I had a mind to. He offered the food then left me be. I nodded thanks and he went across to the female. She was young and slender and had the brightest of red hair. They became very passionate and were touching and kissing. I felt a flush of face and turned away to look at the food. The male at the table near me was looking into an egg shaped object and his fingers were pressing at it. I tried to get a closer look but he saw me, smiled, said something about a “High score” and dropped the egg into his pocket.

The bread had some cheese in it and I have never tasted a food like it. The water was in a clear light container and was as pure as a spring. It had no taste and was cold. I have kept the bottle. The three sat with me for a while. They ate, talked loudly, laughed a lot and ignored me most of the time. Their attire was very fine and none of the men had any armour nor did not see any sign of weaponry. After a time there came the sound of music from one of them. I jumped up and as I did so Ned stomped and whinnied. I went to attend him and move away from the three when the male by the tree lifted a dark egg to his ear. The music stopped and he began to speak loudly and walked away from the group. I could only watch.

The egg was put away into his pocket he gestured to the others to follow and with a wave they all three left the way they had come. I caught one word as they departed it sounded like “Yokel.” I wonder what they meant. I will remember the word.

The Journal.

Today was a difficult for one for me. I had a need to find lodgings for both myself and Ned. I had set up camp on small hillock overlooking a stream. I managed to bathe and pack my heavy armour on to Ned. I broke my fast with a meal of nuts and some hard bread I had with me. Merlin did say that he was sending me to a mythical land of plenty and I would not need much coin. Though my meager supplies will need replenishing soon. This is indeed a strange and wondrous land. The air has an odd taste to it and a constant mist seems to shadow the distance. I have never seen a sun as white as this one appears. There were dragons flying above me last night, winking eyes and some steady. Glowing green and red. I guessed they were very high in the sky as I could only make out a distant rumble. So as to better view the area for threats and settlements I climbed a large tree. It was just starting to darken and from my perch I could see away in the distance glows and lights the like of which I have never known nor could have imagined.

I decided to head west from my camp and where possible avoid contact with the local peasants. I only have five days to gather information. I have a journal into which Merlin has asked I write what I see and feel about this land. He has also given me a crude map and he suggested I head towards the coast. I have Merlin’s load stone and I must use it often and keep it safe. I am to travel light and keep my weaponry hidden from view. On the fifth day I must draw the symbols upon the earth with the salt he has given me. I must be near water and it cannot be still. I have words to incant and gestures to make on the night of the full moon. I must have an empty stomach.

We are of the opinion that this is a peaceful land and the peasants and lords live in harmony with each other. Merlin used his Seeing Bowl and showed me some of the sights I would see. I am in awe of the carriages that have no need of horse and move faster than hare or hound. This will be a wondrous journey. Read now of my journal, for it is written with many an emotion. Merlin has asked me to refrain from wenching, drinking wine and fighting unless provoked. This will be difficult for me but I gave him my pledge.

Day One. Dawn.

I have decided to walk my horse. The load he carries is heavy and his surroundings are not usual. So I walk at his side and console him with quiet song. I have the Sun at my back. It is low in the sky and the night seems to balance the day, the air is cold and the wool beneath my jerkin itches. Here the land is tended and prepared for planting. There is sparse tree cover and game will be a problem. I have seen many rabbits though but no wolves or boar. I passed across one field that was enclosed by linked metal chain so fine I could never imagine a smith of our land making the same. There was a gate that at first looked to be heavy, yet it was tied with a small red rope that did not feel natural. The gate moved easily and I could have lifted it with one arm. I pulled at the tie to test its strength and it resisted well. I have wedged the gate closed with a branch and kept the rope for you to see.

The furrowing of this field is a sight to be seen, deep and straight as no field I have ever seen. The plough-man must be a giant and his steeds would be something to behold. I used my sword to cut a swathe through some hedging and entered into a grove of trees running to my left and right. Through the centre runs a track made from one piece of stone that is black in colour. I can see no joining or mortar and the stone, for that is what it must be, is soft as stale bread. There are some painted white lines along the centre though they are faded. I have decided that I will use this track for a while and I am heading south. I am hoping to find some signs of people.

Taking Up The Sword

Well hello and Hi!.

Tis I here! Just arrived from history on my trusty steed Ned.

I have a need to find an armour buffer as mine be slightly tarnished from all the years I have spent on the road. When I say "On the road" that is what I mean. Many amongst you may surmise that the life of a Knight is something to be admired, well I beg to differ. Living day to day by ones wits and sword prowess is not what a country boy should be doing. Twood rather I be about the fields tending maids and a milking cattle than milking maids and tending battle as is my bane.

A life of toil and servitude to one's Lord Master is a burden. Forever being told to go kill this beast, go rescue this maiden, go gather an army and defend the castle, go escort the lady wife to the bathing house, though there are some chores that are not! if ones gets my wink'ed eye. Oh chastity and honour why did you desert me at a time most dour. Why oh why did my knightly skills fall foul of the naked breast and mound of such a fair maid? Why didst I lunge instead of lounge? what demon possessed me to via grate myself at her quim?

Lust the demoniacal, pleasure the reward and guilt the banner to be carried henceforth.
Woe, woe, woe your boat.........Hmmm I mean Woe, woe woe is me for my humanity, and scarlet of face was she at the sight of my naked, scarred flesh. I canst still hear the echo of her slap as she struck from behind and her unfettered laughter at the redness of my cheeks. I crumbled as to dust in the wind that was, and is still, her beauty. Also her huge puffy breasts did not go amiss nor the fact she was grasping my appendage with such fervor and want.

Moist of loin, not dissimilar to shank of lamb by the way, we did entwine and shag for a few minutes, kiss for an few more then shag, shag, shag. A quick drink and toilet. Then back to the shagging. I was shagged! Her Ladyship was shagged! My steed Ned, did almost beget a similar gift. I fancy he too wanted a shag but he was tied to a post and could only offer a hard stare at the filly left roaming the hillock outside the bathhouse. It is a fact of which I am not proud that most of my batheing day way spent fulfilling her Ladyship's desires. I full filled her quite a few times in fact. Knights are trained to perform to high standards in all we endeavour.

What was a poor knight to do?


to be cont'd